When being good at something isn’t good.

So, I got an email from someone this week and truthfully it was an email they shouldn’t have bothered sending. There are some instances where people need to persist in being an asshole and really I will have none of it – I just can’t waste my time.

But, in this instance it piqued my curiosity and in round about ten minutes I had answers to questions I hadn’t even thought to ask.

We leave a much bigger footprint than any of us realize and also the internet is forever. So, write or do something stupid and chances are more than likely it will follow you to the end of your days. I know of one specific case (actually maybe two or three) where someone succumbed to their stupid urges and it cost them their reputation whether they realized it or not.

In the meantime, this past week I got a short condolence note and really it just wasn’t needed. It wasn’t outwardly nasty in any way but, it was just so incredibly dry and emotionless that considering the source it would have been better for them just STFU.

In the meantime, the sender who I hadn’t really spent a lot of time thinking about – well, let’s just say in fairly short order I was able to find out enough detail about the goings on in their life that I could snicker.

Now, that is somewhat self indulgent but ultimately it’s just a waste of time and later on when I’m thinking a little clearer I hate that I even succumbed to the urge. Time is precious, I can’t waste it on things like that.

Also, all you f**kers using Twitter?

What is your problem? I mean I saw something today where someone is sending out these updates on a regular basis and most of it (the majority) is incredibly inane! What is going on with people in this country? Are they so desperate for attention? I keep thinking the level of stuff you read on Twitter, the level of discovery is just one step above cavemen.

I can see cavemen Twittering now:

“Me discover fire! Am hot! Oucch!”

“Big lizard have sharp teeth, rock useless!”

“Me decorate wall of cave, make picture of mate.”

Unfortunately the whole twitter experience is just one step removed from the stuff above. Get a life folks, you’re just not that interesting besides, people who are accomplishing things in this world don’t have the time to send out pithy, vacuous snippets.

Cleaning out my closet.

More housecleaning especially relevant in light of recent press conferences. Another gem from the drafts queue...

[from 10/18/09]

Fair’s fair.

You cheesy f**kers!

Way back in ’01 during the midst of the 9/11 attacks New York City’s primary election was postponed. The primary was later held and the election went forward but at the time and for long afterward the general consensus was to paint the whole incident as a power grab by then mayor Rudy Guiliani - going as far as to compare the man to facist dictator Mussolini.

All done because in this country today, it’s easy to be deride people of Italian descent. Italians are easy targets, they’re a group that you can get away making bigoted slurs about. It’s okay...

On September 11, the day of the terrorist attacks, New Yorkers were heading to the polls to vote in their mayoral primary. Under the direction of the outgoing incumbent mayor, Rudolph Giuliani, city election officials quickly postponed the election. Giuliani, one who never misses an opportunity to emulate the former Italian dictator Benito Mussolini, toyed with the idea of amending New York City's term limits law so that he could run for mayor for a third consecutive term. Another Giuliani plan would have postponed the primary and regular mayoral election for one year, giving him at least one more year in office with the possibility of a change in the city law to allow him to run for a third term. Another plan would have made Giuliani a write-in candidate. Wary of Giuliani's various proposed election contrivances and his intention to use the attack on the World Trade Center for his own political advantage, New York's City Council and the New York State Legislature quickly put the kibosh to Giuliani postponing the election indefinitely, extending his term for one year, or amending the city's term limit statute. The mayoral primary took place on September 25, two weeks after the terrorist attack, and the general election occurred on schedule on November 6. Michael Bloomberg was sworn in as the new mayor on January 1, 2002.

Current mayor Mike Bloomberg has been no less dictatorial towards the city than his predecessor (congestion pricing anyone?) but, somehow he escapes the fascist rap or any other slurs. Now with the economy doing poorly, we are led to believe the NY City Council should just rescind terms limits (an issue City voters enacted via two referendums) to keep the city‘s future in the stewardship of Bloomberg.

What elitist crap!

If anyone wants proof of what a mistake it is to give a mayor a third term, they need look back no further than the third term of Ed Koch.
[and that’s where I stopped]

Nobody really wants to talk about Mayor Mike and his power grab. Nobody seems to notice the mayor is really good at telling people how to live their lives because he knows what’s good for them. He’s a man who takes the whole idea of being a public servant and turns it on its ear.

Mayor Mike is the penultimate NIMBY dick. How so? Well, let‘s take a look at that old congestion pricing plan Mayor Mike had... basically anyone coming into Manhattan from 96th Street to the Battery would have had to pay eight dollars for the privilege of driving their car in.

Hey Mayor Mike, if public transportation should be used in this congestion zone, why is it so many Manhattanites have cars? I have to say where I live, I can’t just walk down to the corner and catch a subway or a bus that will take me wherever I want to go and I can assure you that the buses or trains within distance here (and it isn’t walking distance) don’t run every five minutes like the ones in Manhattan do.

So, if we were going to enact congestion pricing, why wasn’t the very first part of that discussion something about placing a surcharge on any resident of Manahattan that has a car and thereby contribute to the congestion?

I’ve worked night shifts in the city and when I do, public transportation is a non-starter. All too often working a second shift can mean getting out far too late too late to even be able to catch a train home. What about people who live in outer boroughs whose neighborhoods aren’t served by public transportation the way Manhattanites enjoy?

Let‘s take it one step further...

Congestion pricing does absolutely nothing to address congested areas in the outer boroughs. There are quite a few parts of the city (hell quite a few parts of the tri-state region) with congestion but, what Mayor Mike won’t tell you is very simply this: the fare on mass transit is subsidized by drivers. It’s subsidized through tolls, gas taxes, surcharges on registration and host of other levies.

The city enjoys a good mass transit system but it doesn’t pay for that system. Manahattanites in particular enjoy the luxury of a system other parts of the city and region couldn’t even begin to imagine. How about they start paying for it?

Further, I’m really, really tired of the world‘s 17th richest billionaire (and the city’s richest resident) telling me and other New Yorkers how to live our lives when he is full of crap himself - take for instance his bs about being a subway rider:

On mornings that he takes the subway from home, Mr. Bloomberg is picked up at his Upper East Side town house by a pair of king-size Chevrolet Suburbans. The mayor is driven 22 blocks to the subway station at 59th Street and Lexington Avenue, where he can board an express train to City Hall. His drivers zip past his neighborhood station, a local subway stop a five-minute walk away.

That means Mr. Bloomberg — whose much-discussed subway rides have become an indelible component of his public image — spends a quarter of his ostensibly subterranean commute in an S.U.V.

And Guliani was a dictator? Wake up New York!

Joke for the day.

I was watching the news last night and saw the story about Bill Clinton flying back from North Korea with two American women who had been held against their will. Of course, like anyone who lived through 8 years of Bill Clinton being President I can't say I was at all surprised. If there was anything he was known for it was for getting young pussy in a tight spot.

When I have time on my hands, I find amazing ways to waste it. In this instance writing jokes instead of finding ways to make money!

When stupid people happen.


While I’ve been recuperating with my own personal encounter with the road, the big news around here (here being the local area) has been a really horrid accident which happened not too far from where I live. Literally about five minutes away (driving) and a place I pass most anytime I trek down into the city, the accident in question killed 8 people and injured more.

I heard about it (really there has been no way to escape the coverage) and was dumbfounded by the event. Knowing the local roads as well as I do, I was hard-pressed to imagine how someone could err as badly as the woman who caused the accident erred.

Driving against traffic for some distance on a busy three lane highway is no small feat. Aside from the fact that exits are clearly posted, there even is a ‘turnaround’ (a crossover between the north and southbound lanes) midway along the woman’s trail of destruction. It was an avenue of escape for someone who might have made such an error.

Throughout all the coverage, one thought was nagging in the bag of my mind and that was the woman had been trying to commit suicide somehow. She had several small children in the car, two of her own and three nieces. She had spent the weekend on a camping trip with the husband and it was reported he was venturing off on a fishing trip leaving his wife to return back to their home in Long Island (with the children) without him. It has since been reported he was returning home as well but that doesn’t make much sense seeing as even if they had been in two cars why they wouldn’t make the trip down ‘together.’

The story has those telltale gaps making you think the math doesn’t add up.

Well, today the state police held a press conference in which they disclosed the information the woman had a blood alcohol level twice the legal limit (with 15 ounces of undigested hard liquor still in her stomach) and traces of THC in her system (indicating marijuana intoxication as well).

I have to believe the State Police were well aware of this information for several days now but held back as the children were buried. Of course the upshot has been that the woman up to this point has been painted as a tragic victim of circumstance in all of this who perhaps was suffering from some unknown physical affliction. Since she was driving children in her car, the focus has been almost entirely on her and the innocent passengers in her vehicle but, the thing is she killed THREE OTHER PEOPLE who she hit head-on!

She also managed to injure a few other people too!

The media though finds a better story in depicting some poor women, sick trying to make her way home after a family trip who falls nobly while trying to get her family home.

I’m sorry for the kids but, I also don}t for a minute believe no one in the woman’s family was unaware of her proclivity to indulge in alcohol or pot. Specifically, I can’t imagine her husband didn’t know she was a drinker (or that she was drinking) or that she was a pot-smoker. This seems more than slightly disingenuous. Also, the woman called family on the trip home! Drunk and high, are we to believe the people in her own family couldn’t tell the difference during that phone call?

Maybe this comes across as heartless but, THIS PERSON HAD A RESPONSIBLITY AND F**KED UP! It would be bad enough if she just wrecked her car and she was the sole occupant. It would be even worse if it was a question of her killing members of her own family, BUT SHE KILLED A BUNCH OF OTHER PEOPLE TOO!

Now, the husband is a peace officer (I’m not quite sure if that’s a buzzword for police officer in the municipality where he serves) but do you think this guy should be keeping his job? His wife was smoking pot, HELLO!? What she was out scoring when he was busting other people for it?

I’ve got sympathy for the people she hit. I’ve even got sympathy for the kids who had the misfortune of having an idiot for a parent and an Aunt but for the adults in that family, sorry but I’m not giving you guys a pass on this one.

The rest of the story.*

So here we are at accident plus four (at least I think it’s four... Sunday, Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday. Yep! Four.).

It’s been a busy couple of days but days are always busier when you are getting around on crutches. Also, the days tend to blur together a little bit. I had been really sore on Sunday (d’uh!) and that was the story most of the day. The Monday adventure of getting down to the car and the hospital really was exhausting.

Monday night after I got back from that trip, I just conked out. I wound up waking up around 2 in the morning and puttering around for awhile before I fell back asleep around 6am. Meantime, the plan was to be down at the orthopedist to get a cast put on the leg by 9:15.

I managed to do this somehow. I actually got down there more or less when I was supposed to. This however, underscored something I came to realize quickly; there are a lot of people with handicap shields that really don’t need them.

The building I went down to is some kind of satellite facility for an area hospital and as such, there’s a good deal of traffic into the place. When I got down there for my appointment it turned out every handicap spot was taken (except for the one right by the entrance that was being blocked by the truck of the company that was upgrading the landscaping around the building).

There was another nice handicap spot I just missed by a back door but it got taken by an older couple who popped out of their car looking for all the world like they had a round of golf scheduled after their appointment.

I don’t park in handicap spots. I mean, in my world it just wouldn’t be cool. When my father was really sick there was a point where I thought he should have handicap tags but I never got around to it and really he went out less and less anyway.

I didn’t have tags on my car but, boy! was I desperate to park closer to the building. As it was I crutched about the length of a football field (ouch). The big thing here is not so much the leg itself or how tiring this might be but all the other things which are sore at the moment. The main thing being the rib followed by those big glaring patches of skin.

Well, I made it to the place, got in and got a cast put on my foot. Hobbled around and got another x-ray and was set until next week (when I go back and they look at the thing again). I also managed to get a note from them so I could get a temporary handicap tag and I wound up going to the local Village Hall to do just that.

Thing is the Village Hall also is the place where they have the court too. So to get to the appropriate window, I had to go through the metal detector. Let’s not even go into the stupidity of that whole experience (forcing me to go through the metal detector and then having to wand me anyway).

It’s over though and I even managed to pick up my shirts and some bread from the local bakery although by this point I was lagging.

Someone came over to give me a hand around the house in the afternoon and by the time the evening rolled around once more I was wiped. Today, has just been a bit of muddling around doing this or that and trying to figure out ways to make the next few weeks a little easier. I ordered some stools to propel myself around on and avoid the crutch thing inside.

Other than that though, things really aren’t too bad.

* with apologies to Paul Harvey, Good day!

Three days out.



Ain’t I handsome!?! :)

Actually, that was taken Saturday night on my way home. Like I said they had wanted to keep me overnight in the hospital but I just wanted to be home.

So, what’s it like three days out?

It’s a gigantic pain in the ass getting around on crutches. The crutches thing would be enough of a problem on its own but throw in the broken rib and it means I get a nice twinge in my side every time I go and move around on the damn things. Also, the road rash stuff, those nice big scabby thingies have a tendency to dry out and don’t take well to moving around too much.

I actually dragged my ass back down to the hospital today because I had to get the x-rays they shot. Later this morning, I’ll be going to get the cast put on my ankle.

Overall, I manage to get pretty tired. After the whole trip down to the hospital and back I was wiped out and wound up just going to sleep. I have my moments of energy but I’m figuring I will need at least two weeks to get back to a little bit easier moving around (scabs healing, most of the bruising healing too). The rib and the ankle will take longer. The key is to keep moving around because if you let these things slow you up you have a much rougher time trying to rehabilitate.

Two weeks, piece of cake.

In the meantime, if I can impose upon people every once in awhile, I’ll be fine.

What a long tough road it’s been...

So, what’s the upshot?

A broken rib, a broken ankle, a bunch of stitches along my left eyebrow, scraped knees and a nice patch of road rash along the top of my forearm.

So, I dropped the bike sometime around three pm and I walked back into my door around 9:30. A long, long day is what I call it.

So in the last 48 hours I finished up my four month gig (officially numbering me among the vast multitude of the unemployed) and managed to really injure myself shortly afterward.

I’m upset but not as upset as you might think.

First off, I wasn’t going altogether fast when I dropped the scooter. However, since the thing weighs in the neighborhood of 350 lbs, dropping it is not at all a small matter. The curve I went into was a very sharp one and while I wasn’t going particularly fast, I did do what anyone riding a two wheeler (or any driver for that matter) should do which is try and make the turn ‘straighter.’

You do this by swinging out wide going into a turn, cutting across the lane to swing towards the inner part of the lane at the peak of the curve and then swinging back out. The curve in question is a 320° curve, you basically go into and then come back out going in almost the opposite direction.

So, everything is fine, I throttle down leading into the curve, swing wide, cut across the lane to the inside and prepare to swing back out when my rear tire runs over the double yellow line. The conditions are dry, it’s sunny out but I’m leaning as I take the curve and while the road has grab, the painted yellow line doesn’t. My rear tire tacks out far enough to drop me down on the pavement hard and I continue to slide on my side back out of the lane into the curb.

Most of the time when I ride, I’ll where a jacket or something. Today I happened to be wearing jeans and a t-shirt. I was wearing my boots though, my helmet and gloves but I real came down on the pavement quite solidly. Of course I had a 300 plus pound scooter on top of me.

So, left ankle broken and left rib broken. Stitches where the helmet jammed into the side of my eyebrow ridge so hard it tore a deep gash into the skin.

Now get this... it was right in front of the Trump National Golf Club. So the guy who mans the gate comes out and checks to see if I’m alright, he saw the whole thing, knows I wasn’t going that fast but also saw me come down hard.

As it was he turned out to be a fireman and offered to call the local ambulance corps. Probably a good idea but more than anything at that moment I was embarrassed about dropping the scooter. See, motorcycling (or scootering) is all about taking calculated risk. I took a series of risks today - I didn’t wear arm covering, I probably leaned in a little too much on the curve. Admittedly, I am getting more comfortable on the scooter and therein lies the problem because you can’t ever really get too comfortable.

So, whatever risk you take you have to pay a price. I took a risk and am willing to accept the price I paid. While I’m not happy about it, I’m an adult and actions do have consequences. Right now, all I’m thinking about is how I can rehab as quick as possible to get back out on the scooter again.

In the meantime, I’ll have to still file a claim bike fixed (I’m somewhat bummed I dropped my perfect scoot).

Back to our story though...

So, my leg really hurt and more than a couple of people saw that I had dropped the thing and stopped to ask if I was alright. Again, mainly my pride at the moment. I got the thing back up by myself – picture this now, I got a 300 lb piece of equipment that was lying on it’s side upright, with a broken rib and a broken ankle.

The guy came out more than once to check on me and I was just checking my wounds, getting my bearings and figuring out what I wanted to do next. He offered again to call the EMTs but I could only think of them flatbedding the scooter and then trying to figure out a way of getting back from the hospital so I decided the best thing to do was to drive the scooter home (which i did, although I think the front fork is out of whack) and then drive myself down to the hospital.

My neighbor happened to be backing out of his driveway when I pulled up and I just wanted to check in with him and when he saw me his mouth pretty much dropped. He helped me get the bike back into my garage and offered to drive me down to the ER but I just wanted to get a few things and then do it myself.

Which I did.

I got a couple of bottles of water, some things to read and paperwork I’ve been putting off doing basically because the thought of being stuck somewhere, waiting and not being able to use the time productively drives me a bit batty.

I then got in the car, drove myself down and walked into the emergency room.

Now, since I walked in - they didn’t really take much notice of me right away but apparently if I had let the guy call the EMTs not only would I have been taken to another hospital but they would have taken me to the trauma unit (yes Virginia, it was that bad).

So, after several hours which involved in no particular order a tetanus shot, a whole slew of x-rays, a cat scan and getting my leg put into a rather large splint (I have to get a cast put on Monday it seems) - I’m home.

This has perhaps underlined the disadvantages of living on my own and not really having or relying on other people. I have family but the truth is, I don’t have kids or any close brothers or sisters so whatever I do I have to kind of make it up. Not a problem a lot of the time except in instances like this.

I’ll have to work on that.

I’ve got some pretty powerful antibiotics and they gave me some serious pain medicine. I managed to fill the prescriptions they gave me because (lo and behold) the local pharmacy is actually 24 hours and a drive through to boot! The people there were also nice enough to get me some half and half I needed.

The great part of it all was being asked repeatedly by the medical staff how I got to the hospital after I dropped the scooter, when they heard the story (and given how banged up I was) they simply were dumbfounded - what can I say, I come from tough stock.

OUCH!

Stupidity



I "dropped" my scooter today, it was that fast. Right now I'm in the local emergency room with the. ballgame on the TV, It could be a lot, lot worse. I've got some nice road burn on my left arm, both knees are scraped up, I'm going to have a decent shiner, I've probably got a sprained ankle and fortunately only a few bruises.

It was sunny and dry and I was going around a very sharp corner when I hit the double yellow line and lost traction, next thing you know I was sliding across the road with the scooter on top of me. I hit the curb hard and truthfully felt more embarrassed than anything else

I just hate being in the hospital and really don't want to let anything slow me down.

The last days.

Today was a bit interesting. The place I’ve been working at held a company wide off-site at the Bronx Zoo. Freelancers could come but, you wouldn’t be paid. A bunch of freelancers opted not to go but, I decided I very much did want to go and I’m glad I did.

I haven’t been to the zoo in ages and it’s really, really beautiful. One of the perks of going was that all attendees got a ticket they could use to visit the zoo at some point in the future. I didn’t spend much time after everything wrapped up (the batteries on my camera died) but, I’m certain to go back because it really was wonderful.

Getting back to the off-site though, it’s been a long time since I’ve been involved in any kind of company activity via any of the places I’ve worked. The last time I think was when I was working at as a production manager somewhere and they had a Christmas party at a nice restaurant. It was pleasant but since it was a small office it’s not like there were very many people in attendance. Thinking about it now, it had to be at least seven years ago.

Quite a stretch of time.

Still, I’ve really been enjoying my current gig. I’m happy with where I sit and I like the people around me. The work is painless for the most part and I have little to complain about. Unfortunately the assignment is drawing to an end. It was supposed to wrap up last month but I suddenly got extended another month (for which I was very happy). Barring something else happening my last day will be next week and I have to say I’m a little sad over that.

I’ve gotten into a bit of a routine and I find I’m liking the structure of it – I needed a bit of structure and I knew it ahead of time.

So, I got to go to the zoo today and again it was indeed a lot of fun. About the only animals I really saw where walruses (or were they seals?) in a big outdoor pool after everything broke up. You know, I can’t say I found them too interesting though. See most of the noises they were making sounded a amazingly like the noises my stomach makes and I get enough of that at home.

Cleaning out my closet.

For the time being, since I find myself on the fence about posting to the blog I think maybe I shall just clean out innumerable drafts and finish up snippets of things...

[from 11/23/06]

There is no escape.

I have to go up and see the EYOC on the holiday, it’s only right. So, when I got up there earlier today and walked into his room I found him sprawled across the bed, perpendicular to the head of the bed. Whether he was trying to get in or out of it, I couldn’t really tell.

So, without him even turning around I asked him if he wanted me to help him.

My man
Muscles from hand to foot
Completely covered in uninterrupted skin
My man
Signals command the leg
To follow orders coming down from headquarters
Why then am I in bed?
I guess my man's fallen out with my head

May I direct your attention to the following simile
You’re like the coasts of an ocean
Buried beneath is a submarine cable
Connecting the opposite shores that surround it

My man
How can he stand?
Your fingers could encircle clear around the ankle
My man won’t walk again
In conflict with express instructions given by the brain
Why can’t the message be sent?
I guess my man’s fallen out with my head

When something happens to drag on the floor of the ocean
For instance an anchor or mooring
The cable can be disrupted and even be severed
Which halts the transmission across it

There is no way to repair the break

My man
Muscles from hand to foot
Completely covered in uninterrupted skin
My man
Signals command the leg
To follow orders coming down from headquarters
My man
How can he stand?
My man
Muscles from hand to foot
Completely covered in uninterrupted skin
My man
Won’t walk again

[and that’s where I stopped]


There were many moments like that, many moments over the last years of his life where I found myself in the unlikely role of helper to my tormentor.

What does a statement like that mean though?

Well, I was talking to a friend last weekend. She finds herself trodding a similar path to the one I took several years back. Over the course of our long conversation that day, she lamented what a tortuous road she is on.

She finds herself taking care of an aging parent.

Beyond that, she finds it often to be the most thankless of jobs. I know what that’s like. Responsibility isn’t asked for, it is often thrust on a person and how they act when the onus is placed upon them is the measure of their character.

Is it possible to show mercy to someone when they are at their weakest? Certainly a display of mercy is appropriate when someone has proven themselves to be kind but, what about when they have a history of behaving like a petty despot?

Being part of a generation raised by the television, there was a seemingly endless parade of perfect nuclear families on display each and every day of my life. Perfect and there to provide an endless yardstick with which to measure the dysfunction of one’s own family.

What fun.

Anyway, if you have been crushed under the heel of a tyrant, the question is whether or not you can be merciful when your roles are reversed and if you can, is this the truest test of what is called a Christian ideal?

Let’s go a step further...

Does it matter? Are we beholden to some kind of retribution at the end of our lives? Let’s say we’re not, then what is the motivation to be merciful?

Well, this is what I was talking about with my friend.

She found herself in a pit of despair. It wasn’t so much she was doing a bad job overseeing her charge. Actually, it was anything but, she has done an incredible job. However, throughout she has been challenged and tested by the very person whose care she is overseeing. She has been berated, insulted, belittled, cursed... you name it. Still she’s hanging in there for some reason and while she’s hanging in there she questions her sanity for doing so.

I know these feelings well.

And I told her clearly, in as encouraging a way as I could: You are doing an incredible job and your parent is lucky to have you.

She has siblings and while they aren’t bad people, they have made themselves scarce if you get my drift. It doesn’t mean they’re evil, just not up to the challenge. It’s a test, one of life’s toughest tests. She is coming through it with flying colors and I told her there will come a day when she recognizes just how good a job she did and she will be able to look at herself in a mirror and be proud, maybe not proud even so much as knowing she did the right thing.

Many moments, I found myself in a position where I had to step up. Deep down inside, for whatever reason, there was this overwhelming sense of responsibility I could never escape, even if I wanted to. It was a matter not just of seeing something through but also doing a good job. I paid a high price for that, higher than many people might realize but I know I did the right thing.

When I walked into that room many months back and saw a small, bitter man trying to right himself, fighting with all his might against the insurmountable enemy that is time, I could not help but feel mercy and compassion. The words to that song rang in my head and I could feel myself tearing up. I could feel sad over one who at once seemed so powerful being struck down and weaker and more helpless than a baby.

This is what I tried to convey to my friend. The simple fact sometimes, you have to do the right thing if for no one other than yourself.

Cleaning out my closet.

For the time being, since I find myself on the fence about posting to the blog I think maybe I shall just clean out innumerable drafts and finish up snippets of things...

[from September, 2008]

False vanity.

I’ve let my hair grow long, way long. So amazingly long, it goes down below the shoulder blades of my back.

I don’t think much about it. I don’t think much about the way I look anymore until I see a picture of myself and I cringe not knowing who that person is staring back at me in the photo. I ask myself, ‘Is that me? Do I really look like that?’

Then again, I’ve always been like that.

I mean, I don’t have a really sense of how the world around me perceives me. I don’t know if other people have better senses of themselves or not. We are all of us carried about in bags of flesh, housing whatever electrical impulses there are that make each of us unique.

I look back on pictures of me when I was younger and it‘s hilarious. It’s funny because the person I see in those pictures is not the person I felt I was at the time. This is not about flaws, just about our own perceptions. Our ideas of ourselves and how critical or uncritical we may be.

Like I said, I don’t spend a lot of time thinking about it and when I do I am always amazed at the big disconnect.

Lately, I’ve been thinking about getting a haircut. If I wanted to make it really easy, I would just get the electric razor (hair trimmer) I have out and shave everything off. This would be shocking to some. It wouldn’t be shocking to me, just different. Invariably though it would affect the people around me because it would be something they would have to get used to.

I've been thinking seriously about doing it. I was trying to come up with a way to do it and do some good in the process.

This year, two people I know have struggled with brain cancer.

One guy found out he had a tumor on Memorial Day and died back in August. It was that fast.

Another person had suffered with a tumor for many years and underwent radiation to shrink the tumor for once and for all

[and that’s where I stopped]

Fate has a caustic sense of irony though. I had all my hair cut off. I knew I’d be out there looking for work and didn’t feel the need to handicap myself so, off it went. I took my ponytail and sent it off to an organization that takes donations of hair to make wigs for children suffering from cancer (and as a result have gone bald from the chemo). Might as well try to do something good.

That’s not ironic, what’s ironic was another friend being stricken with a brain tumor.

She is (was) another one of these forces of nature. There are a few of them I’ve run across in my days, amazingly beautiful women who have a capacity for drawing people into their orbit and getting things done (When I think about who these women are I think about Sarah, Mickey, Monica and Heidi).

You’d have to meet them to know what it is I’m talking about.

In this case, I got an email round about February from Monica. It was one of those group e-mailings to let everyone know what was happening with her (to ease the load on her staff and to keep them from repeating the story over and over and over again). It was very matter of fact and downplayed the seriousness of what lied ahead.

Paraphrasing it, it read along the lines of, “I haven’t been feeling well for awhile and we’ve discovered I have a tumor in my brain and I’ll be going in for surgery tomorrow. After surgery and some recovery (about six weeks) I should be back at work, good as new.”

Well, that was before the stroke during the operation. It was before the long road of rehabilitation and radiation.

I went up to visit Monica once and came away shaken. I pray for her and her family each day because she has a tremendous struggle ahead of her and I can hardly imagine her being laid low as she has been. Still, if anyone is capable of overcoming something of such a magnitude it’s her.

It puts the whole vanity thing in perspective though.

It’s not just what people say.

But also about what they don’t say. I realize more and more there is something in the not saying anything that can be as much of a transgression as there is in saying something.

Generally, I’m try to follow the tenant of live and let live but there are times when I just can’t refrain.

I had lunch with a friend this past week. The guy is someone I used to work with years ago and we worked fairly closely to each other for about three or four years. I mean that in the sense that we were cubicle neighbors.

He was a good neighbor for the most part, highly opinionated, loud and brash and times but someone with a good heart.

Reacquainting myself reminds me again of those qualities I liked about him.

He broke his arm not too long ago punching a guy in the subway. That he punched someone in the subway is not entirely surprising, that he broke his arm is. Certainly, he was well within his rights by doing what he did (punching someone). To me, he’s a New Yorker.

He’s not some johnny-come-lately transplant who considers themselves a New Yorker rather, he’s a born and bred, dyed in wool true New Yorker. The kind that harkens back to the old days when the city wasn’t at all the kinder, gentler place it is now since it has long since been Disneyfied. He’s got that rough around the edges, street smart thing going on in spades. It doesn’t mean he isn’t a good guy, absolutely the opposite but, his tolerance for stupidity is low and I think on that level we connect.

Friday, I was down in my local laundromat.

Why I just don’t break down and get a washer and dryer I’ll never know but going down to the laudromat is just something keeping me honest.

I’m always fascinated too by the whole laundromat experience, who goes, when they go, why they go... that kind of thing. I’m pretty much guaranteed if I go very early in the morning on a weekday to have a very quiet laundry experience whereas if I go on a weekend it is diametrically opposite in tone. There’s much more noise and clamor on the weekend than during the week.

Party time in the laundromat.

Anyway, Friday I got out of work early and figured it would be a good idea to run some of those errands that will take up Saturday morning (if they wind up getting done at all). So, I made the quick trip to the dry cleaners and then shot over to do the wash.

Now, maybe it’s just me but I think there’s something wrong with letting your kid sit in a dryer. When I got into the laundry and was trying to get my clothes from the doorway to the bulk washer I had my path blocked by this woman who had taken over a section of the laundromat. Better still was her kid who was sitting halfway into the dryer.

Aside from the fact other people are using the thing to dry their clothes, and aside from the fact these dryers seem to break down periodically from misuse is there anyone else who finds it odd? So, as I was trying to get by and had to get by the kid with the dryer door open (who closed the dryer door and sealed herself in so I could pass), I made her get out and I made it clear to the mother she wasn’t to get back in.

????

There was another woman in there who had been giving the mom and her kid this kind of look, the look that said, “You really shouldn’t let your child do that.” But she wasn’t saying anything!

Alright, so fair enough.

I don’t babysit my clothes either. I come back in an amount of time to move the things to the dryer and then come back as they are finishing up the drying process to do my folding.

So, when I got back, my clothes were out of the washer.

Why this bothers me, I don’t know but it does. I have this concern about the stray sock getting misplaced by careless transfer of some other clothing mishap. It’s a bit irrational, I know so I try to keep my annoyance subdued.

However, the person who removed my clothes (which had stopped no more than five minutes earlier) did have other washers available. Also, it was again one of those people who descend on the laundromat like a plague of locusts with enough clothes to garb a small army. In tow were three kids and a man of some undetermined relation.

I threw my stuff in the dryer and took off again.

Later on I came back. Friday was one of those relatively warm days for a change. The sun actually made it out from behind the clouds for a few hours and it really felt a bit more like summer because of it. So, even though it was late in the afternoon it was kind of hot out. When I had gone down earlier to the laundromat I had set the doors open because the ceiling fans weren’t turned on and it gets unbearably hot in there.

When I came back the doors were closed for some strange reason and I walked in to a nice bracing wall of heat as I opened the door since all the dryers were going. I latched one of the doors open, and then started to get about the business of prepping the table there for some folding.

The person who had moved my clothes out of the dryer had taken over the front part of the laundromat, taken up all the remaining dryers but four (two of which I had) and left little or no space for the other people in at the time (and the laundry was starting to fill up since it was early evening on Friday).

As I’m getting my clothes together, the guy that was with her goes over to close the door. See, he was playing some kind of handheld video game and they had a two or three year old with them. Basically he couldn’t be bothered to watch the kid and keep her from going out of the doors so he closed the doors so everyone could sweat.

Needless to say again, just as the guy is getting ready to close the doors, I yell from the other side of the laundromat, “KEEP IT OPEN!” He looks for at me for a second, sizes up the situation and then moves away from the door. Now he has to keep a closer eye on the kid. The other kids had been running around, screaming, playing because they were bored. Well, after I made that comment about the door everything quieted down considerably.

There were four or five other people in the laundromat at the time. One guy went and sat down by the open door afterwards to stay cool. Generally though, people seemed a lot more comfortable with the doors open and without kids running around in this small, hot space, yelling and screaming.

Now, I don’t like having to say anything at all. But geez! Show some damn consideration to the people around you. If you keep your mouth shut when you see people being rude does it make more sense just to walk around later talking about it when you could’ve just opened your mouth and put a stop to it?

Sporadic blogging.

I find myself far too busy, far too preoccupied to focus on much else these days other than the regimen of just getting up, getting into work and home each day. Sounds boring maybe? Actually it’s not. Any time I start to feel sorry for myself or have those pangs of woe concerning the things I lack, I remind myself of the things I have.

There are a few things I really like about life these days. I've been enjoying getting up early and the days when the ride to work is a quiet one. The walk down to work and back can be quite nice. I'm still wanting to get a bit more exercise but I am maintaining which is a good thing. I’m actually at a point too where I feel I can do more, not less which is another good thing because it means the energy level is slowly ramping upward.

The walk isn’t at all exhausting and I’m at a point now where I’d like to start getting a bunch more walking in, longer walking since the weather is so very nice.

If only it would just stop raining so much!

The houseguest.

Being a freelancer (especially long-term) is somewhat akin to being someone’s houseguest. You”re not entirely considered one of the family but how much you’re involved in the inner workings of the household is up to your hosts.

One of the things I liked very much early on about my current gig is the feeling of inclusiveness I was getting. While it’s changed a little bit, I am always surprised by the amorphous rules that apply. There are some things I’m in the loop on and others I’m not.

It can be a blessing in many ways because by not being included, I avoid some of the office drama inherent in any work situation. I am never quite clear of the players or the sides and truthfully it’s fine with me although there occasionally seems to be some kind of buzz going on and I sometimes find it hard not to internalize it rather than just shut myself off to it.

However, one of the things I do get included in is the sporadic office survey. Every once in a while one of these things is generated (via email) and sent out to the employees who are a bit of a focus group. I can’t get into specifics but, the question on one recently was about blogging - if you blogged, how much and the like. It was a bit of a skills assessment. Fine with me because I’ve been trying to figure out a way to make this pay for some time now and if I could, believe me I’d do it!

Go figure.

So, it’s been a hectic week to say the least. Holidays are great things unless of course you’re a freelancer which means you lose income for at least the day the office is closed. To compensate, I’ve wound up putting in long days back to back (and probably to back).

I get home late at night, I mean I walk in the door and it’s after 9pm and this is after I’ve been up since 4:30am so it’s a bit of a long day. I’m winding down now... I just have an hour or two to spend and it’s odd but there comes this point in the day where I do have free time and even though I have a list of things to do, I just can’t motivate myself to keep going.

So, I was aimlessly surfing. You know, the futile waste of time, something that just gobbles up the moments and lets you turn your brain off.

And I wound up looking at someone’s blog, a woman who was a friend of Madam X and as I was reading through it I came across pics of Madam X’s wedding.

Now, there are a lot of responses a man can have to these kind of things. I mean I spent a good chunk of my life with the woman and seeing pictures of her wedding to another man could be a peril fraught event.

But, it was funny...

I smiled.

I smiled from ear to ear because she looked absolutely beautiful and maybe I’m an idiot but I’m glad for her. I really wish her well.

I’d be lying if I said I was sorry it wasn’t me but you know something? I loved that woman with a passion I don’t think many people could understand and more than anything I wanted her to be happy. I don’t know if many can understand that but man! She looked gorgeous and you can’t spend time with someone and love them and not want the absolute best for them.

If that makes me a schmuck, so be it.

Wolverine.

Lest I forget, I saw Wolverine this week (a full two weeks before it’s theatrical release) and I have to say it was pretty good. I enjoyed it and they didn’t stray to far a field from the character’s backstory, I think fans will enjoy it and there are a couple of cool surprises too!

A few brief words on a Sunday morning.

Just because I have a moment or two before I go out and take a ride on the scooter and enjoy some of the wonderful weather.

I’m four weeks in on the job thing and I’m liking it. There are days of course, days when you feel a little off or things seem to drag but for the most part it’s as painless as a gig could be and I’m happy (and feel lucky) for the opportunity.

Friday night I was out with relatives having dinner, aside from making fun of the fact that we were going to dinner at 6pm and how it might be an indicator of advancing age, it also gives us a chance to catch up with one and other’s lives. Of course I was asked how things were going with the job and I described my day - getting up at a quarter to five each morning, leaving the house sometime between 7 to 8 and then returning home sometime after 7 or so in the evening.

Everybody commented on what a long day it is and were frankly a little surprised.

Surprised?

Mainly, they were surprised at my diligence. The long hours and the like seemed to surprise them too.

Thing is, whenever I work, I’m quite accustomed to putting in long hours. In the past I might have started later but it only meant the day went later and I didn’t get home until 10 at night. I’m not minding the change in schedule. I’ve settled into a bit of a nice routine too. Plus, I make it a point to walk back and forth from Grand Central to the office everyday. It’s a solid 40 to 50 minutes of walking I’m gettting in and I like it. I like the daily exercise, I enjoy the walk itself.

As a matter of fact, I had taken the opportunity to change a whole bunch of things as I started the new gig.

For instance, I changed my diet. Not just my diet but how and when I eat because my body is changing too as I get older. The body doesn’t need as much nor does it metabolize food in the same way it did when I was in my twenties. I cut out a bunch of foods (a lot of dairy), no more coffee (although that doesn’t mean I am adverse to it completely, I just haven’t been drinking it), more water, more fruits and vegatables. The upshot was for the first time in quite some time the numbers on the scale have gone down.

I almost don’t believe it.

Really! Because it has been that easy. I’m just surprised at how taking little steps, painless steps have produced such dramatic results.

How dramatic?

In four weeks, I dropped between 10 and 17 pounds. I got on the scale one day and I couldn’t believe the number, it didn’t make sense that I had lost that much weight (but I had). So, going forward as I start to do some more exercise and weight training again, I’ll be interested in seeing what happens. Mind you, at this point I’m only 12 or so pounds above what I weighed when I was going to the gym everyday (doing cardio) and working with a trainer three times a week. So, it seems the majority of the work will be less about shedding and more about firming up neglected muscle.

Like I said, I can’t believe it... it was that easy.

Easter.

Tonight the local ABC affiliate is running The Ten Commandments. As I’m skipping around the channels, I’ll lan don it and watch it for awhile. As I was watching though the thought occurred to me the film is about due for a remake and I could just see them casting Kenau Reeves as Moses – wouldn’t that be funny?

Five months to the day.

I’d ask if you missed me but then again there is one constant and that’s the fat, nosy prick who keeps lurking around.

In the meantime, blogging may have well and truly run its course. While I was ‘away,’ the blog managed to ring up on it’s sixth anniversary and while I was tempted to mark the occasion, I just let it pass unnoticed.

What’s been happening?

Mmmm...

Good question.

Well, I’m one of the fortunate few who actually has found work (something that seems to be the exception rather than the rule in today’s economy) and I’m doing my level best to be the model employee. I find as time goes on, my requirements for work have changed dramatically. I’m not so concerned now about the job per se as much as I am being able to show up, do my work and go home with a minimum of drama.

And I have a bit of a social life as well so all things considered I can’t really complain too much. There just isn’t any reason to. Not that there aren’t things to piss and moan about in this world but I’m coming to the conclusion pissing and moaning really doesn’t do me much good and keeps me from enjoying the days I do have available to me.

Warmer weather is here now (or at least we’re on the cusp of it) and last weekend I took a nice 50-mile drive on my scooter, taking in the lovely countryside up in Putnam County.

Life is pretty good. I hope it’s been as good for you as it’s been for me these last few months.

Farting Friday.

Because farts are funny (and this will have to do until I go through some more old magazines and get a bunch of Photo Funnies scanned)

The amazing thing about the human race is that we can make a sport out of anything. Case in point:



I’ve heard of the Wide World of Sports but is the Wild World of Farts?

The Obama Brand.

Or where John McCain missed it.

I started this a few days back and since I am out the door in a little bit to vote I might as well finish it up:

Thankfully we are only a few days out from the election. I say thankfully because I tire of the quadrennial frenzy out nation descends into every time a Presidential election rolls around. If only people would get as excited and as passionate for local elections – where are all you f*@#ers then?

Anyway, watching John McCain flounder through this campaign has been a real wonder to behold. I mean that in the most snarky and sarcastic sense because if ever there was a political candidate who so embodied the character from Animal House it would be Red State John.

Watching the ’08 edition of the Republican Party flail away has been simply amazing as they have tried time and time again to make something stick against Teflon Barack.

The thing is, Barack Obama has positioned his brand so well coming into this election cycle, he made himself almost impossible to beat.

Obama’s campaign from the very start was based around a single premise, a premise his whole brand identity was built upon.

Change.

It’s as simple as that, you can sum up Obama’s campaign in a single word and the candidate has hammered away continually reinforcing it in the electorate’s mind. A single word, which serves a multiple purpose.

First, it plays well to all the people who have been carrying pent up anger and venom ever since the 2000 election. These are the people who have so loudly and repeatedly called for some kind of change in the makeup of our government.

Funny thing is, we had a taste of that change during the ’06 midterm election when the Democrats. The end result... not much.

Six-point plan
Prior to the election in July 2006 Democrats unveiled a six-point plan they promised to enact if elected with congressional majorities. The plan was billed the “Six for 06 agenda” and officially called "A New Direction For America" and compared to the 1994 Republican “Contract with America.” The six-points of the plan include: “honest leadership and open government, real security, energy independence, economic prosperity and educational excellence, a healthcare system that works for everyone, and retirement security.”

People in this country have short memories, plainly put with a Democratic majority in both houses for the last two years and Congress has very little to show for it. This rally cry against one party or another doesn’t address the underlying dysfunction in our government. The government of our nation has been at best a reactionary force in American society and at worst a sterling example of how bureaucracy fails when compromised at the alter of Capitalism.

The dialog in our country especially in regard to the current election has been a fascinating glimpse into the fractured psyche of the American public. Is our government supposed to be a paternalistic entity? If so, how far are we willing to let our government become involved in our affairs? People at once want government to do something about health-care, about education, about business and a host of other issues but how restrictive do we want government to be? When government starts becoming involved in social issues, is it a good thing or a bad thing? We walk a tightrope here, some recognize it but many do not.

Getting back to the current election though, Obama has built the perfect brand... his brand is change.

Are you unhappy? Change.

Not making enough money? Change.

Don’t like our foreign policy? Change.

Worried about government spending? CHANGE!

It’s so broad and generic a term it defies the inherent hazards of specificity.

This is where John McCain has failed because he has been unable to distance himself from the current administration. John McCain’s campaign has tried repeatedly to figure out how to position their candidate - first it was as the ‘experienced guy’ but that didn’t work. Then, it was as the [i]‘heroic guy’[/i] but that didn’t work either. Finally it was the ‘progressive guy’ (as evidenced by his VP choice) but ultimately that didn’t work either.

In the meantime, Obama has positioned himself as an agent of change. What that change will be, the American people have a vague idea of but it will be change.

I’ve gotten emails about our descent into Socialism, as if somehow this is supposed to raise some specter of fear in me.

Yet, I’m not afraid.

McCain has not been the only candidate frustrated by the Obama campaign’s deft positioning... speak to any HRC supporter and you’ll find a lingering bitterness, a disbelief in how her coronation somehow could not come to pass. How was it possible for the ultimate strategists to be outsmarted so?

Strategy? You must of course realize Barack Obama has not just foiled the plans of the RNC. No, he has also managed to foil the very carefully mapped out plans of the Clinton camp. Plans that included HRC sticking it out through Bill’s many dalliances, HRC taking a senate seat in a state to echo the path of RFK and all the built-up goodwill of stumping for so many Democratic candidates over the last 8 years building chits to be called in during her abortive presidential bid.

In any case, this year’s election has to be one of the best examples of the marketing of a candidate to come along since we started having elections. This has been the perfect example of an election for a media-obsessed society. To the detriment of everything else put on hold as we progress to this one-day.

I’m back and I’ve already taken care of voting. It promises to be one of those elections where there is a big turnout. I was 31 out of 400 registered voters for my polling location and it wasn’t even 7:30! I’m not going to watch all the polling news, I’m not going to stay riveted to the TV over this. Tomorrow, one way or the other it will be settled, we will have voted and a decision will have been made. It’s not a football game, or the World Series where you root for one side or another. As long as people come out and vote... we all win.

In little more than 48 hours.

We will have elected a new President. Somehow contrary to what all the Chicken Littles would have had you believe, we survived. Whatever will you mealy-mouth cretins complain about now? I’m sure you’ll find something.

(and I’m speaking as someone who didn’t vote for Bush, hasn’t been enamoured with the guy but is tired of listening to all the whining of the last eight years)

Farting Friday.

Because farts are funny (and this will have to do until I go through some more old magazines and get a bunch of Photo Funnies scanned)

Farting is the great equalizer of this world because everyone does it even if no one will admit to it. It doesn’t matter if it’s the homeless guy in the street or if it’s the President of the United States, everyone breaks wind at some point. Even our friends in the animal kingdom share this ability but, I have to say you don’t want to get around the business end of some creatures when the urge hits them because they have no trepidation about letting loose as this short shows:

Don’t believe in change.

Election day is almost upon us and of course in the next few days the drumbeat will increase to a fever pitch as the very real prospect of one candidate winning and the other losing will become a reality.

I’ve made up my mind who I’m voting for, I still can’t fathom people who say they are as yet undecided. Do these same people need help having someone picking out their clothes for them in the morning or having another person feed them?

Thing is, whoever gets in, people need to be a lot more realistic about what our prospects are.

We are on the cusp of a prolonged recession. The volatility of the market aside, over the coming months there will be decreased consumer spending, higher unemployment and growing deficits.

If you doubt me on this, ask yourself how freely you spend money given the current economy and how secure you feel about money going forward.

The point is whoever wins this election will have a tough row to hoe. There will be very little leeway for any chief executive after dealing with the problems of the economy. Consequently, expect the next year to two years to be a very difficult time.

I don’t want to sound pessimistic but, as caught up as people can get in the frenzy of campaign season, it is imperative to realize January 21st, 2009 if your guy wins, the sun will not immediately come out, birds will not start singing and all will not suddenly become happiness and light. The people who believe that are going to be in for something of a rude awakening.

Likewise, if your guy loses... well, it’s not all the new President’s fault if things suddenly don’t go swimmingly. I would venture between now and round about June of 2010 were going to be having some sobering times. The booms in the last century were in the 20’s, the 50’s and the 90’s it may be a bit of time before another boom comes along.

You should ask yourself.

Watch this clip, these are your fellow Americans. Never for a second forget that no matter where you live, this is a big country and there are a lot of people in it. No matter how enlightened we would like to suppose ourselves to be (as Americans), it doesn’t mean everybody in the country shares our views.

However, as you watch this clip mull on this - if you’ve found yourself expousing these views, don’t they sound a bit ignorant? If you’re totally opposed to these views, how would you go about convincing the people in this video of the validity of your argument. That’s our true battle as a nation, getting everyone to agree because unlike a lot of other places on this planet, our nation is one of the few countries that embodies the idea of people of different origins coming together in one great amalgam.



And yes, I find this hysterically funny.

Meanwhile, back in the states.

You know, while all this stuff was going on... all the back and forth last week (on PPP boards), I kept flashing on this image. I couldn’t quite remember where I had seen it but, it bore a striking resemblance to the offending party. I kept thinking about it because it nagged at me and then I found it:


This was definitely one of those moments I was reminded of the old Spy Magazine feature seperated at birth.

The ongoing saga of Petulant Peter Pejorative.

Last weekend’s little go-round with the ‘elite intelligentsias’ proved to me, once again, why the intrinsic problems confronting our society face little hope of being solved. Some people are far more interested in proving their superiority than actually listening. Additionally, nobody likes it when others find cracks in your arguments. Hey, I’m the same way too so it’s not like I can complain about it too much.

I’ve never been worried about odds though in any fight so, I don’t mind taking my lumps. At least not if I feel I have validity in my argument. I don’t go through the world thinking I know it all or I can’t learn something by listening to other people. In the end my experience overall wasn’t a bad one, limited by the nature of board posting, but certainly not entirely bad as there were some people who wanted to try and understand my views.

It’s not a win/lose issue either. It’s more a matter of trying to get someone to acknowledge or at least see how he or she is living by a double standard.

What Petulant Peter does in the company of his friends is none of my concern. When he writes,

“...And I know plenty of Italians who like Italian jokes, Polish who like Polish jokes, Catholics who like Catholic jokes, etc. That’s because I tend to associate with people who don’t wear their indignation on their sleeves.”

It’s great! I’m glad for him (and I’m not being facetious about this either). He’s surrounded by people who understand his sense of humor and he’s among friends. To me there is a barrier, what he does in his private life is no one’s affair.

The difference here is you have a very smart man, who has an audience, a man who uses words to earn his living. Petulant Peter is not a fool and I imagine he wouldn’t be a popular writer (or at least as successful as he has been) if he did not have the ability to pick his words carefully.

This is what gives me great pause.

He used these words in a public forum. However, I may be giving the Petulant one more credit (and traffic) than he is due. It might actually be the traffic to his site is very low and consequently there are few who have seen his feeble attempt at humor.

Like I indicated though, I’ve been known to be wrong (BELIEVE ME) ;) and with that in mind. I sent out an email as follows:

Subject: The Italian question

I read something recently and I wondered if my reaction was unique or not. Consequently I’m doing a bit of a survey and you can help me out.

I recently read the following joke:

And somewhere at this very moment... a Mafia wiseguy called “Joe the Plumber” is saying, “I’m gonna have t’get a new f*ckin’” nickname...”

My question is this: when you read this comment what is the image of the “Mafia wiseguy” that comes to mind?

Is it an Italian?

If not, what kind of person do you picture?

If so, are you okay with the joke?

Do you think it is perpetuating a stereotype of Italians even though the word Italian is not used?

Thanks in advance for your help.

PJ

I may have screwed up with the subject line. I was trying to figure a way to ask the question without biasing the response I received. If it would produce skewed results and it would defeat the purpose of the email. I wanted to gauge the response to Petulant Peter’s cheap shot among people who would feel the barb most acutely and here is a sampling of the responses:

...in my opinion the word “Mafia” in itself, comes from the Sicilian language, meaning “a wise guy” or someone with power, or another word you never hear, at least not in the USA is “Malandrino” which is also indicative of a Mafioso type of individual. I think that over the last hundred years or so, the media and good ol’ American racism, stereotyped the Mafia as being an Italian favorite pass time, and everyone of Italian descent is connected or knows someone. Well, that’s not exactly true, this country was built on criminals and murderers and cattle rustlers of all creeds and background...

Anytime you use the phrase ‘mafia wise guy’ an Italian comes to mind. And like African Americans, I’m not too thrilled with outsiders using the stereotype. In fact there are some days when I’ll let it pass and others when I wont. I resent the fact that people are still comfortable denigrating Italians, Jews, Mexicans and Asians, in this so-called enlightened p.c. era.

Well... since the word Italian was in your subject line, I already had an idea of where this was going before I read the “joke.” But generally, when one hears a “joke” about the Mafia they think of the stereotypical Italian, even though all Italians are not in the Mafia and the Mafia is not comprised of only Italians. The joke in and of itself doesn't bother me - but what does bother me is the double standard.

I do not consider myself Italian American. I am American. my ancestors came to this country to be American, for a better life. I am enjoying the fruits of their decision in the greatest country on this planet. I will die defending the rights of other U.S. citizens to say whatever they want to say no matter how ignorant or stupid it is; and there is a lot of that going around.

So far, PPP’s batting 1.000 among the Italians here. People seemed to have picked out the word Mafia or wiseguy separately in the discussion over on PPP’s board but, putting them together creates a whole other animal. It’s one of the reasons I suggested the hitman route.

I’m not holding myself out to be the paragon of virtue or esteem when it comes to these things. I believe a many of us succumb on occasion to easily definable labels as they apply to groups of people other than our own. I’m embarrassed by it in myself when it happens, I should know better. While it’s easier just to classify people by groups rather than to put the work in to get to know individuals, there’s no zero sum game to it and we are doing both ourselves a disservice as well as the people we encounter in our daily lives by doing it. It’s what I find to be the best argument against that sort of thing.

I wonder about it sometimes. I wonder if we’re hardwired for this or if it is learned behavior. I’d like to think it will be erased some day, I don’t think it will be in my lifetime but I can hope. It’s not just a racial thing either, you can look at a whole plethora of spots around the world where people are fighting and killing each other over all sorts of things - religion, ethnicity, race. Give a person a reason to mark another guy as different and you give them a reason to fight.

Anyway, getting back to the topic at hand...

After I had sent out the email and gotten back a bunch of responses, I felt some follow up was in order. It didn’t make sense to continue a discussion with people who had no interest in hearing my side, whether it was by their own purposeful obstinance or a deep-seated insensitivity. I’ve been back once or twice (I think) to mainly copy the thread and saw something I didn’t understand said at the bottom although when I did it made me laugh.

So, here’s what I did: I copied all the emails and the thread in its entirety and mailed it off to two organizations in Washington (they have nothing to do with our government, they’re just based in Washington like all the other lobbying organizations). I’m not looking to embark on a crusade, frankly I don’t have the time for it.

Another letter I sent out was to a man who I believe is a much smarter man than I am. The man in this instance is a man also of Italian descent with a long career in business and also in service to his country who also happens to sit on the board of a company the Petulant one derives significant income from.

A majority of the defense of these comments in bad taste was directed back at me in the form of chiding me for being oversensitive, ridiculous or stupid. Consequently, I leave it to others who are verifiably much smarter than I.

The thing I found truly infuriating was this gem, “...the “stereotype” was this close to dying off. And then I make a joke and suddenly it gains new life.”

It summer up the problem in a few words. If a smart man acknowledges a stereotype and still feels it‘s okay to use and perpetuate then it will never die. Let others make the decision about its use. Like one of the people above noted it’s just a crappy double standard and it won’t go away if we to excuse its use.

Farting Friday.

Because farts are funny (and this will have to do until I go through some more old magazines and get a bunch of Photo Funnies scanned)

Be careful at the airport!

Why?

Well, you’ve no doubt heard about the new scanners they are slowly implemently at airport security gates? The ones that scan you so closely they can tell if you’re wearing boxers or briefs. Well, an unintended benefit is that they have removed the ability to leave the SBD – no longer will phantom farters be able to emit a stench that remains long after they’ve departed and leave their victims wondering who was responsible!

Best cartoon ever!



This is something fully appreciated by anyone who has ever worked in design or production.

VIDEO VAULT THURSDAY!
(because exclamation points make all the difference)

This week on VIDEO VAULT THURSDAYS I found myself in a bit of a quandary! You see there is a very good, nay! Spectacular video I wanted to share but, unfortunately the powers that be have decided to place very strict restrictions on its distribution so I can’t embed it as I would normally do.

FEAR NOT!

Instead, I happened upon a phenomenal performance of the song live! This is a really kick-ass live performance:


Still, VIDEO VAULT THURSDAYS! is all about videos so after watching that live performance you can compare it to the well-made video directed by filmmaker Paul Thomas Anderson and decide for yourself which version you like better!

The stars are out!

One thing about New York is the stars are always out, even during the daytime!

In all the time I’ve lived in New York, it seems I’ve seldom run across people of fame. At least if I did I didn’t recognize them.

Sure, I managed to get a lot of pictures of John Glover, Eric Bogosian and Vincent D’Onofrio once when I happened upon a location shoot of Law and Order CI. Another time I was out with a friend on the upper west side after having lunch together and saw Robert DeNiro filming a scene from Midnight Run.

Normally though I just don’t see famous people on the streets of Manhattan.

Well, today was a twofer...

I was having lunch down in one of my favorite restaurants, Mario Batali’s Lupa on Thompson Street, when my lunch companion elbowed me to look over when an attractive blonde entered and was waiting to be seated. She was striking to be sure but then New York is full of beautiful women. An explosion of blonde hair, large hoop earrings and big eyes the woman was clad in a downy jacket, tight jeans and thigh high boats. She was very much ‘put-together.’ I glanced quickly and then turned back not wanting to be obvious or rude.

There was a pause and then a moment later something clicked and I was thinking I must know her from somewhere. I did the quick rundown and looked over again and realized it was Mina Suvari! She was meeting her current beau for a nice lunch, having done some shopping. I was trying to remember what else she had been in besides American Beauty (I wound up having to look it up) but, she is a really beautiful girl.


Later on I was sitting with my friend Ed having coffee and watching people pass on the street outside when a girl walked by and I again had that momentary flash of recognition. This time it was Bonnie Dennison walking up First Avenue. I’m not a soap fan but I understand she’s on The Guiding Light now. I recognize her though from her time on Third Watch playing the daughter of one of the leads.


She must live in the neighborhood because it’s the second time I’ve seen her. I walked by her as she was coming out of a haircutters on 23rd Street awhile back. So, the stars really were out today.

This is funny.

As we get closer to the election, there is a sense of desperation setting in. How do I know this?

I know this from the things I see around me, the emails I receive, the stories in the newspaper, and the pictures that are taken.

I saw this posted to a contact’s Flickr stream:


Not so much a statement of fact, as much of an example of the lengths McCain supporters are going to in an attempt play to potential voters’ fear (okay, there’s nothing on it that says it’s from a McCain supporter but I can’t imagine an Obama supporter would be running around putting something like this on a person’s windshield).

Then, I got this:



I watched the whole thing, you should too.

I don’t like politics of fear and it doesn’t matter to me who is doing it. When I got the following email back on November 4, 2004 I was no less annoyed:

Dear friends,

I have been composing this note in my mind all morning. I guess it's a sort of concession note, one which I was hoping and praying would be a victory note instead.

This is a very dark day for our country. The unified blindness to the danger that this administration poses to our very way of life and to our lives, is astonishing.

We are now in profound danger of losing everything that this country has stood for for over two hundred years. This disregard for the Constitution (which a President is sworn to protect) and the contempt for individual rights which this Administration has practiced is now only going to increase, as their perception that the American people approve of their actions is now in play.

It baffles me how the idea of "values" seems to have been completely distorted. Pastors around the country stood at their pulpits this past Sunday and urged their congregation to support Bush and his contingent because they represent "family values". They will get rid of Roe vs Wade, they will prevent gay marriage, they will bring prayer in schools and they will promote faith based initiatives... These issues are just a smoke screen put up to blind people to the fact that this administration has only one true "value" and that is MONEY. This country just sold it's soul to the devil and doesn't even know it.

What kind of "values" allowed them to murder thousands of innocent Iraqi civilians, people whose only crime was they were in the way of Dick Cheney gaining control of the Iraqi oil fields and in the way of this administration's desire to set up permanent US bases in the middle east (that is what they are doing in Iraq, building permanent bases), these people weren't insurgents or terrorists, they were ordinary people going about their lives, children, babies, mothers, fathers, grandparents, farmers, teachers, lawyers and doctors, eating breakfast, going to school, telling their children bedtime stories, when bombs started dropping on their homes, their schools and their places of business. They hadn't threatened us, they hadn't attacked us, they hadn't done anything which justifies their deaths. (And what about the thousands who have been maimed, blinded, orphaned... homeless and jobless, the atrocities our government perpetrated are endless).

This Administration's "values" are to sacrifice the lives of brave young men and women whose only mistake was to trust their government. Brave and honorable American military personnel who had faith that their president wouldn't put them in harm's way unless it was absolutely necessary. Their lives are being sacrificed for the almighty god "dollar".

"Thou shall not commit murder..." unless you can justify it with lies. These are the real "values" of this administration, lies, murder and contempt for anyone who disagrees with them.

Trying to find ways around the Geneva Convention (which simply promotes human decency), mistreating helpless prisoners, keeping people imprisoned with no access to counsel (not everyone in Guantanamo Bay and other prisons is guilty, but have no way to defend themselves), this is the kind of behavior we equate with dictators and despots like Stalin and Hitler and yes, Saddam, not with our great American "values" of liberty and justice.

What kind of "values" justify the selling of our nation's beauty to the highest bidder? The fact that this Administration is willing to sell off forrest which are thousands of years old (some trees where saplings when Christ walked the earth), sell off the glorious beauty of God's creations, plant and animal, for corporate profit and greed is a sin not a "family value". The fact that they will pollute and plunder this magnificent planet is tragic.

They are selling off our children's future, they are putting our health on the block for the highest bidder. And they are doing it behind closed doors in secret meetings... those are the real "family values" of this Administration, how valuable is your family to their wallets. They rule the country through fear, when the truth is we should be afraid of them.

America is in for a shock when the truth of just how corrupt this Administration is begins to be clear. Because mark my words they are corrupt, "power corrupts, and absolute power corrupts absolutely"... well the blind faith of the people just gave them "absolute power".

I have a prayer today for the "Presidential Prayer Group", pray for America's sons and daughters because their lives have just been put into the hands of monsters...

And grieve with me because our lives are about to be forever changed...

Yours, O

PS Let's never give up the faith that real "values" will eventually prevail and we will be able to regain some sort of true decency and justice and honor to the concept of being a American. Let's march and write and demonstrate and not go gently into the night! And most importantly never ever give in to the fear and betray your fellows, together we will stand, divided we will fall.

I responded to the email’s sender in kind and told him not to pass off this whiny, poor me bs off on me. The response I got was full of vitriol but the upshot was I should think about leaving the country or as the last line of the email put it: So, maybe you should go to Bermuda... Or go to hell.

Yes, it’s easy to remain friends when people agree with you, not so much when they don’t.

Looking at that email now though, a couple of things immediately jump out at me.

First off, we’re still here.

How did that happen? Four years later and we are all still here! An amazing thing, no? The sky didn’t fall and we survived. All the gloom and doom embodied in the email sent to me on election day of 2004 and while things aren’t wonderfully, rosy, lollipop dreams we truly never know what they would have been like if the other guy won. They could be better or they could be worse and we’ll never know.

But... we survived.

Among the things the email warned of happening:

• They will get rid of Roe vs Wade (still here last time I checked)


• they will prevent gay marriage (well that didn’t happen, if anything there have been more states recognizing it)


• they will bring prayer in schools and they will promote faith based initiatives (I don’t think prayer in schools has gone through - I’m sure they have continued to promote faith based initiatives but I’m not quite sure to what effect)


• ...that is what they are doing in Iraq, building permanent bases (if anything I think people here feel we can’t get out soon enough and as far as permanent bases go I don’t even think the Iraqis want us there)


• The fact that this Administration is willing to sell off forest which are thousands of years old (our forests are still there)


• pray for America’s sons and daughters because their lives have just been put into the hands of monsters...

I mean... c’mon.

The point I’m trying to make here is no matter who wins, our nation is strong enough to survive it and if we want to make progress as a nation we have to begin to adjust our attitudes. When the American electorate felt the administration had failed them, the midterm election provided an opportunity for the citizens of this country to voice their displeasure and voice it they did. The Republican party lost control of the House, it happened for a reason, it happened because our system works.

It doesn’t work 100% of the time, it’s not perfect, far from it. The people who live in our land want desperately to get things right and I think all of us buy into the ideal.

One of the things I liked about the last debate... I mean really, REALLY liked. It was the fact Barack Obama didn’t succumb to the temptation to paint his opponent as a polar opposite. He was able to recognize there are areas where the two men agree and even issues where Obama has great respect for the stands his opponent has taken. In that single moment he looked to me, more presidential than any leader we have had in a long time.

Will this translate to an effective term in office should he become Chief Executive? I truly do not know. Even assuming he will win, is putting the cart before the horse because they are other factors in play here. Race, whether or not it is overt element of the contest, is still an issue in some people’s minds. It’s unfortunate, but I think people would be foolish to blind themselves of the role it is playing in this Presidential election.

Flip side, I saw this story in the paper:

Franklin County, Ohio, prosecutor Ron O’Brien launched the investigation after student reporters at palestra.net, a Fox News affiliate, discovered the mass registration effort at the home in a working-class neighborhood on Brownlee Avenue.

“Our board of elections referred 13 suspicious registrations to us, all from people with out-of-state addresses, all of whom claim to be living in a three-bedroom house in Columbus,” O’Brien said Friday.

Vote From Home is registered to the East 82nd Street brownstone of Heather Halstead, daughter of Halstead Properties founder Clark Halstead Jr. She and her husband, NYU grad Marc Gustafson, are among those under scrutiny.

Maybe there is this feeling, things like this are necessary but, I can’t condone the idea of ‘winning at all costs.’ It’s an attitude the sacrifices all the noble rhetoric and high-ideals. I’m enough of a realist to know politics are a dirty game but isn’t there a point where these things should stop? It sure seems as if no one is blameless.

Putting it to good use.

Over the past few months, two people within my sphere have been confronted with the challenge of being diagnosed with a brain tumor.

The first person, a man who had just retired from job after many years and who was looking forward to retirement, complained about being dizzy back around Memorial Day weekend. He died in August. He went into the hospital and that was pretty much it, for the next twelve weeks he did the shuffle people who confront life threatening illness do and finally he succumbed. It has been a tremendous blow to his family. At the same time when a person in your family is confrronted with any kind of illness, there is a helplessness people as they watch a loved one undergo what can be a life ending battle.

The second person is a peer who had been diagnosed long ago with a tumor and had thought the matter had been resolved only to find it hadn’t. Her symptoms came upon her and she knew something was wrong. The upshot was she had to become her own advocate and wound up having both surgery and then undergoing an arduous round of radiation therapy.

When things like these happen, you want to make some kind of gesture, some show of support.

I had been thinking about this very thing over the last two months. Trying to come up with a way to do something good.

Originally, I had thought about shaving my head and trying to elicit some kind of donations from people to put towards a related charity. I figure there are more than a few people in this world who would pay money to see me look foolish, so why not put that to good use? I looked around but I wasn’t finding the charity I wanted.

Then a week or so ago I was out with someone and she mentioned something in passing. My ears immediately perked up! I had never heard about it before but it still fit the bill. It’s an organization called, Locks of Love:

WHAT IS LOCKS OF LOVE?

Locks of Love is a public non-profit organization that provides hairpieces to financially disadvantaged children in the United States and Canada under age 18 suffering from long-term medical hair loss from any diagnosis. We meet a unique need for children by using donated hair to create the highest quality hair prosthetics. Most of the children helped by Locks of Love have lost their hair due to a medical condition called alopecia areata, which has no known cause or cure. The prostheses we provide help to restore their self-esteem and their confidence, enabling them to face the world and their peers.

So, suffice to say I will be sporting a much shorter doo by Halloween.